Jennifer Recommends

Opening to Channel class, taught by Kim Robinson, Angel Reader.

Saturday, June 20, 2009 in Stockton, CA

Contact Kim for details.

Notable Quote

“What your heart thinks is great, is great. The soul’s emphasis is always right.”

Neale Donald Walsch,  author of
Conversations with God

A free eCourse for you

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Volume 2, Issue 10
May 27, 2009


Today’s newsletter puts the spotlight on being true to your Authentic Self.

Jennifer GraingerWishing you much love and light,

Jennifer Grainger
Jennifer T. Grainger, B.Msc.
Founder: Spiritual Growth Community


Following the Call of Your Heart & Soul is NOT Selfish

“I just feel so selfish,” said Marianne (Not her real name). “Andrew is trying to convince me to give up my art classes. He says in this economy we all need to sacrifice and art classes don’t qualify as a necessity.”

“So why do you feel selfish?” I asked.

“Because when I told him my art classes feed my soul, he said I was selfish for thinking only of my own happiness. So that makes me selfish, right?”

“Marianne, it’s not that simple. There are so many levels to look at when discerning the ‘right’ thing to do. How about if we take the judgment out of the equation and take another look, okay?”


“Labeling yourself as selfish is a judgment that says what you want is wrong. And now the focus of attention between you and Andrew is on who is right and not on the deeper issue of following your heart and satisfying your soul’s calling.”

“Hah! If I said that to Andrew he’d roll his eyes and say something like ‘get real!’”

My heart went out to Marianne. All her life she’d been on the path she was programmed to travel. A path founded on unconscious limiting beliefs that have her wearing a mask and playing a role that she was told would make her a “good person.”

But since her “wake-up call” of facing a serious illness nudged her into meditating and paying attention to her heart and soul, she is being relentlessly called to set aside the programmed masks and roles, and step into being her Authentic self.

This is the spiritual journey. As we grow spiritually we shift internally, that is, mentally and emotionally. Things that we believed to be true are revealed to not be true at all. One of my big realizations was seeing for the first time how I morphed this way and that to fit in. I thought I was being polite as I was trained to be. When I saw that my true motive was to avoid conflict because I was afraid of confrontation, I was devastated. It seemed my whole life had been a lie.

Sanaya Roman of LuminEssence ( ) calls this “the crisis of recognition.” It was painful! But only because of the harsh judgment I served on myself.

As we shift internally our energy field begins to vibrate at a different rate. If the people we regularly interact with don’t shift too, we find ourselves out of harmony with them. It is a tricky transition to navigate, that is for sure! Daunting, even!

“Marianne,” I said. “If we drop the struggle over whether what you want is selfish or not and focus on what you can do so that you get your needs met and so does Andrew, you will be having an entirely different conversation with him.”

“Like how?”

“You could start with talking about what he is afraid of if you continue with your art classes. If he is worried about a financial crunch that might happen, that is different than dealing with a financial crunch that is happening right now. Do your homework. What are the actual facts of the situation? Where does the cost of your art classes fit in your overall budget? What are you willing to eliminate so you can continue with your classes? Can you find a way to get your art needs met in a way other than taking paid classes?”

Marianne and I continued brainstorming with our focus on how she and Andrew can both get what they need. From that level of conversation judgment disappears. Fortunately Marianne and Andrew genuinely love and care for each other. They were also taking classes on developing relationship skills. They could work their way through this.

Had they been a couple locked in a power struggle with each only motivated to find fault and lay blame and come out the victor on who was “right” . . . well, that would have been a different story.

BOTTOM LINE: As you grow spiritually, you change internally, which alters the frequency of your energy broadcast. As you drop the masks and roles, close relationships need to be renegotiated to accommodate the emergence of your Authentic Self.

TIP: Navigating a close relationship is the fast track for spiritual growth. Getting your “buttons pushed” reveals areas within yourself that are ready to grow. Getting up to speed on modern relationship skills will go a long way to smoothing the path.

P.S. I highly recommend the book, Lasting Love: The 5 Secrets of Growing a Vital, Conscious Relationship, Gay Hendricks, Ph.D. and Kathlyn Hendricks, Ph. D.

Community Member’s Aha! Moments

Jennifer Grainger NewsletterDo you have an Aha! Moment you’d like to share? Does feeling selfish create struggle with the call from your heart and soul? Are you navigating a relationship transition? Have you had a “crisis of recognition” you can share? What do you think?

I want to hear from you! Tell me about your latest Aha! moment. 

Jennifer Grainger


Tomorrow, Thursday, May 28, 2009 is our Bonus class, open to non-members. If you are not a member of the Spiritual Growth Community, click here to register.

Title: Your Open Heart is Your Connection to Your Sixth Sense.

Description: There will be a brief overview of how having an open heart strengthens your sixth sense followed by me channeling on the topic to get the perspective from the spiritual realm.


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